I came across this while cleaning out old files.
Taoism Shit Happens
Confuscianism Confusius say "Shit Happens"
Buddhism If Shit Happens, it really is not Shit
Zen Shit only Happens when it does not Happen
What is the sound of Shit Happening
Hinduism This Shit Happened before (and it will Happen again)
Islam If Shit Happens, it is the will of Allah
Protestant Let Shit Happen to someone else
Catholic If Shit Happens, you deserve it!
Judaism Why does this Shit always Happen to us?
Atheism Shit Happens for no apparent reason.
Agnosticism I think that Shit Happens
Baptist I believe Shit Happens! (Amen!)
Jehovah Witness Let us in and we will tell you why Shit Happens
Knock, knock. Shit Happens
Scientologist Feces Occurs
Hare Krishna ShitHappensShitHappensShitHappensShitHappensShitHappens
Existentialism I Shit, therefore I am (Defeco ergo sum)
New Age Shit came to me in a vision....
Rastafarianism Let's smoke this shit.
Paganism If you send Shit out into the world, it will return to you threefold
Mormons If Shit happens, the Church gets 10%
Stoics This Shit doesn't bother me
Hedonists There's nothing like a good Shit Happening
New Life Christian Pay us money, or Shit will Happen
Branch Davidianism David Koresh: I am the Shit
Occultism I see Shit Happening in your future
Bahaiism Same Shit, different pile
Lutheran What does it mean when people say Shit Happens